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[ruchir]

So, TV channel Kab-Tak? once again asked Srinath to do the interview thing as Reporter Mangal Pandey was indisposed with diarrhea. Srinath went to ENG and was able to track down Inzy, who was sitting poolside but was wearing wollen clothes.

Srinath: Hello lady and gent. You are watching my very own and personal programme - The Sriway. I am here in ENG to interviewstically talk to Inzy. I can see him sitting poolside wearing wollen clothes.

Srinath walks upto Inzy and sits besides him.

Srinath: Inzy, how are you? Why are you openly wearing wollen clothes in summerly heat?
Inzy: As-Salaam-Alaikum. Bismillah ur Reham Al Rahim. First of all, iz, thanks to Allah. Iz, yeezzzzz, I a feel to cold az a nose is to get a block by something. Iz, when I a sneez a big bubble iz a come to out.

Srinath: Oh. I am very and terribly sorry upon hearing that. Anyway, you lost the 3rd Test and the series. What happened?
Inzy: Iz, what is to a say? I am Inzy. I scored a 15017 run. Theze lazy boyz!! Thiz Butt, izz, he a alwayz to scratch his butt and not a bat. He not a score. Thiz Umar!! Iz, I want a clap to hard on hiz face. He a rascal. Thiz Iqbal!! What iz to him? He not a play and Woolmer get to him in team? And Sami? Iz, He not a know how a ball to batter. And Kaneria? Iz, What he a do? He a become to like a Kumble. Iz, he a twist hiz body a more than to hiz ball.

Srinath: Okay. How about you? You again invented a really comedianistic way to get yourself out of there!! What words do you have for that?
Inzy: Izzzz, he he he he he. I am Inzy. I scored a 15017 run. What is to say? Iz, when I a lost to 17 kilo in WC2003, I not a score to run. So, I think a get back to 17 kilo. Iz, now when I get back to a 17 kilo, iz, I not a get to balance my tummy. Iz, he he he he he.... So, iz, I a fell to down. Iz, actually, my a wife to tell me eat a 10 aalu-paratha to 17 kilo. Iz, but I eat to a more and get back to a 24 kilo. Iz, now I not a to run. Iz, I a walk only.

Srinath: But in 2nd innings also, you were LBW. Why are you not able to beat the ball with the bat? I hear you played a lot of Gulli-Danda in your puberty days, i mean, your young boyz days.
Inzy: Iz, what Gulli? And, what iz to a Danda? Iz, gullli not a spin on earth. Iz, I not a have a run in gulli-danda. Iz, I still a play to gulli-danda with a son of me. Iz, he a hit the gulli like a hard boyz. Iz, I am Inzy. I scored a 15017 run. He iz a son of me. Iz, he a score 15017 run in gulli-danda.

Srinath: In both innings, Panesar purchased your wicket without really spending too much money on you. What do you have to speak regarding this purchase and sale of your wicket.
Inzy: Iz, he a bad to businezz. Iz, I a ready to donate a wicket for free and he paid to still to get it?? Iz, ha ha ha ha. Iz, what a fool?

Srinath: Okay, so now you have gainfully put on some free and extra kilos. How are you decidedly planning to lose them?
Inzy: Iz, I am Inzy. I scored a 15017 run. Iz, I not a get to 24 kilo to a loze? But, iz, a wife iz an angry to me. She a tell I too a heavy and, iz, a mattrezz on bed is a squeak to loud. Iz, she a complain to Woolmer. Iz, he a hire a gymnast to help a balance to me and not a fall. Iz, he he he he he he... now I a learn balance on iron balance beam. Iz, thiz gymnast teacher. Iz, she a sexy Russian. Iz, very tight cloth. She a make to me climb a iron beam, iz, and a walk on it. Iz, when I fall to down a floor is break. Iz, she a get iron to floor so it not a break. Iz, now my butt is hurt a lot in pain. Iz, Aaaayyyyiiiiii...., izzzz...

Srinath: Hhmmm... a gymnast teacher studenting you on balances. AUS also hired baseball man to learn throwing. Ha ha ha ha ha.... they should have called Muralitharan instead. Cheap and best. So, Inzy, What is your favorite song right now?
Inzy: Iz, it a Tubthumping -- Iz, I a get knocked to a down, but, iz, I up to get again. Iz, you're keep me gonna never to a down.

Srinath: Good choice. Let's review. What else is there to question. Oh yes. What are your plans for the last test in The Oval?
Inzy: Iz, Aalu? Izzzzzz, did a you to just say a Aalu?

Srinath: No, Inzy. I said The Oval. The stadium.
Inzy: Iz, oh. Iz, yezzz, I a tell to boyz a play like hard boyz. Iz, call a Pietersen to chicken. Iz, he he he... he a chicken. Iz, I a make to sure a that Ter****st not a take wicket of me. Iz, if he do and I a tell to Mian Mushy that he a Ter****st and he Mushy iz, to a hire him in a LET. Iz, I a give B-Tex lotion a Butt to put on hiz butt. Iz, what iz to else a do? Iz, I a pray to allah iz, a give a help to me. Iz, I also a wash my beard. Iz, boyz sneez and cough when a they practice to me o na ground. Iz, he he he he he.... a lot white power is a fly in air when I iz a itch to my beard.

Srinath: Pietersen, the chicken. Ha ha ha ha ha.... how in the heaven and hell and wherever, did Kaneria come up with that?
Inzy: Iz, that not a Kaneria idea. Iz, I am Inzy. I scored a 15017 run. Iz, that a my idea. Wife iz a send chicken tikka to me. Iz, I eat a lot in lunch. Iz, then a Kaneria iz a ask to me a what is to do a get Pietersen to out. Iz, I not a say to anything. Iz, I a just give a big burrrp. Iz, he he he he, Kaneria iz a smell to chicken. Iz, chicken Pietersen iz a idea of me.

Srinath: Well, Inzy. This talking interview was really opening my eyes. I thank you and all the best for the last frontier, I mean the last test. The is Srinath, logging out from my program - The Sriway.

[achutank]

Well, Inzy. This talking interview was really opening my eyes.

brilliant applause given 

[arjun]

Terrific! Applause.

But this 15000 run thing- has Inzy borrowed the phrase from you know who?

[dhruvdeepak]

i thought inzy had scored 15017 runs  iz false reporting

[ruchir]

Terrific! Applause.

But this 15000 run thing- has Inzy borrowed the phrase from you know who?

ARJUN: If you were following my Inzy interviews from the beginning, Inzy had borrowed this 15000 run phrase a long time ago. To initiate you, I have used Inzy as captain of IND since the beginning of his interviews. Usually, I used to write Inzy interviews for IND games. Now, since there is no IND game going on, I wrote it for PAK game. To cut the long story short, Inzy alternates as IND and PAK captain. When captaining IND, he subs SG, hence the use of 15000 run phrase.

Recently, he increased his runs to 15017, as DD pointed out.

[ruchir]

i thought inzy had scored 15017 runs  iz false reporting

First of all, iz, a thank to you. Iz, I am Inzy. Iz, I a gain to 24 kilo so I confuse a what to say. Iz, he he he he...