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AuthorTopic: Celebrate .. but remember the 5 stages of drunkenness..  (Read 582 times)

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LosingNow

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Celebrate .. but remember the 5 stages of drunkenness..
« on: August 07, 2006, 04:54:22 PM »
Now that all the winners are going celebrating ..
http://www.bbc.co.uk/lincolnshire/student_life/beer_clever.shtml

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The five stages of drunkenness

Stage 1 - FEELING CLEVER
This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject in the known universe. You know you know everything and you want to pass on your knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this stage you are always right, and, of course, the person you are talking to is very wrong. This makes for an interesting argument when both parties are CLEVER.

Stage 2 - ATTRACTIVE
This is when you realise that you are the most ATTRACTIVE person in the entire bar and that everyone fancies you. You can go up to a perfect stranger knowing that they fancy you and really want to talk to you. Bear in mind that you are still CLEVER, so you can talk to this person about any subject under the sun.

Stage 3 - RICH
This is when you suddenly become the RICHEST person in the room. You can buy drinks for the entire bar because you have a bottomless wallet. You can also make bets at this stage, because of course you are still CLEVER so, naturally, you will always win. Anyway, it doesn't matter how much you bet because you are RICH. You will also buy drinks for everyone that you fancy, in the knowledge that you are clearly the most ATTRACTIVE person present.

Stage 4 - INVINCIBLE
You are now ready to pick fights with anyone and everyone, especially those with whom you have been betting or arguing. This is because you are now INVINCIBLE. At this point you can also go up to the partners of the people who you fancy and challenge them to a battle of wits or strength. You have no fear of losing this battle, because as well as being INVINCIBLE you are CLEVER, you're RICH and you're more ATTRACTIVE than them anyway.

Stage 5- INVISIBLE
This is the final stage of drunkenness. At this point you can do anything, because you are now INVISIBLE. You can dance on a table to impress the people who you fancy because the rest of the people in the room cannot see you. You can also snog the face off them for the same reason. You are also INVISIBLE to the people who want to fight you. You can walk through the street singing at the top of your lungs because no one can see or hear you and because you're still CLEVER you know all 
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toney

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Re: Celebrate .. but remember the 5 stages of drunkenness..
« Reply #1 on: August 07, 2006, 05:27:41 PM »
I have some different experiences but then, I guess it differs from person to person. I usually jump Stage 2 to Stage 5 and then to Stage 4. I skip the stage 3 because there are buddies RICHER than me.
« Last Edit: August 07, 2006, 05:48:29 PM by toney »
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When intelligence matures and lodges securely in the mind it becomes wisdom. When wisdom is integrated with life and becomes action it becomes Bhakti. Knowledge when it becomes fully mature is Bhakti. To believe that Jnana and Bhakti, knowledge & devotion, are different from each other is ignorance.

sgusa

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Re: Celebrate .. but remember the 5 stages of drunkenness..
« Reply #2 on: August 07, 2006, 05:45:59 PM »
I have some different experiences but then, I guess it differs from person to person. I usually jump Stage 2 to Stage 5 and then to Stage 4. I skip the 4 because there are buddies RICHER than me.


I suppose loss of reading comprehension is a stage too :D

(Stage 3 is the RICH stage !)
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toney

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Re: Celebrate .. but remember the 5 stages of drunkenness..
« Reply #3 on: August 07, 2006, 05:47:11 PM »
SGusa, are you trying to malign my reputation here by misquoting me? :D
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When intelligence matures and lodges securely in the mind it becomes wisdom. When wisdom is integrated with life and becomes action it becomes Bhakti. Knowledge when it becomes fully mature is Bhakti. To believe that Jnana and Bhakti, knowledge & devotion, are different from each other is ignorance.

Cover Point

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Re: Celebrate .. but remember the 5 stages of drunkenness..
« Reply #4 on: August 07, 2006, 05:49:47 PM »
SGusa, are you trying to malign my reputation here by misquoting me? :D

Toni, piyaakad aadmi hai. Nawab Tunn hai! You could get away if the "last Edit" feature was turned off :)
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toney

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Re: Celebrate .. but remember the 5 stages of drunkenness..
« Reply #5 on: August 07, 2006, 05:53:31 PM »
whispering to CP: how do I turn it off?
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When intelligence matures and lodges securely in the mind it becomes wisdom. When wisdom is integrated with life and becomes action it becomes Bhakti. Knowledge when it becomes fully mature is Bhakti. To believe that Jnana and Bhakti, knowledge & devotion, are different from each other is ignorance.

sgusa

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Re: Celebrate .. but remember the 5 stages of drunkenness..
« Reply #6 on: August 07, 2006, 05:55:07 PM »
SGusa, are you trying to malign my reputation here by misquoting me? :D

Hahahaha. Good try, but pretty much everything you do is logged :D
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Cover Point

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Re: Celebrate .. but remember the 5 stages of drunkenness..
« Reply #7 on: August 07, 2006, 06:08:23 PM »
whispering to CP: how do I turn it off?

You cant :) .... only big Brother Dexy can do it . (or should it be ..big sister :) )
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