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Cover Point

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Tendulkar Scratches Butt
« on: May 08, 2006, 05:53:50 PM »
Tendulkar Scratches Butt

Mumbai May 8, 2006 (CP News line): This afternoon at approximately 3:04 PM the great Indian icon Sachin Tendulkar was seen scratching his butt. His wife (whatsername) was not around him when this happened. Surprisingly this great act was not captured by any of the 1000 odd television cameras that follow our icons around 24/7.  Sehwag when contacted and asked about this incident claimed that he too misses scratching his butt and is worried about Aarti catching him in the act. In anycase his hands are usually occupied elsewhere (clutching paranthas usually).

Ganguly when contacted said he had no comments on the incident though he did mention that score 15000 runs can cause some itchiness in Buttocular region.

Former Great Bedi, blasted Tendulkar and mentioned that people of his generation never had any itches as such (ofcourse they were helped by having their heads in that region)

Sunny Gavaskar, wrote in his column that he would be happy to scratch his butt (and of anyone from the ICC office) for all 365 days of the year.

Chappel said that him and Gloster were working on fitness drills to ensure that Butt scratching can be reduced to a minimum.

Dravid said that it was all about the process. He was hoping to achieve efficiency in such a way that the butt scratching could be kept to a mimimum. He did say it was a team game and each one of the players were happy to scratch each other's butt.

Some sections of the press had some stories flying around about this conspiracy by Chappel and his team. They alleged this Butt scratching was due to the increased workload that was put on the team and the fitness drills. "When you are constantly running laps and stretching and doing all kinds of wierd exercises, then there is bound to be some perspiration in that region" Said a renowned journalist Sanjay Jha. "This kind of thing would never have happened under Ganguly/Wright" he continued.

Tendulkar when he was finally reached just said that it was itchy

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kingcool1432

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Re: Tendulkar Scratches Butt
« Reply #1 on: May 08, 2006, 06:05:30 PM »
When I read the title i thought it was something to do with Tendulkar and Salman Butt :D
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ruchir

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Re: Tendulkar Scratches Butt
« Reply #2 on: May 08, 2006, 06:21:12 PM »
CP: Excellent... an applause.

By the way, my sources tell me that few other players had some comments on this incident too.

Yuvraj: On being asked about Sachin's butt scratching, Yuvraj said that he misses Sachin in the team very much and would gladly do this job for him. He said that he used to perform this task for Ganguly earlier and his hands had been itching to get laid on some butt other than his own. He said he would gladly perform this easy task so that Sachin does not have to put any extra strain on his elbow and shoulder. He reminded that he was a "Young and hard" player.

Raina: Raina said in a reply that he was too busy jumping on Yuvraj and Pathan and must have missed this landmark event of Sachin cratching his butt. He had tears in his eyes while making this statement. He said that his own butt is often scratched by the joysticks of Yuvraj and Pathan when he jumps on them. He also reminded that both Yuvraj and Pathan were "Young and hard" players.

Agarkar: On being contacted, he said that this was not something new to him. He said he had witnessed Sachin scratching his butt a lot in the showers of stadiums in Mumbai where they used to play domestic matches together. He, secretly, said that once or twice he remembers Sachin using a brush to perform the task of scratching; though he can not confirm it or provide any further evidence of it.

Kambli: Kambli just laughed off the incident. He said that the enemies of Sachin were spreading these stories. However, in a weaker moment after being give 5 patiala pegs, Kambli said that butt was nothing, Sachin used to scratch his groin area a lot in his younger days. After coming into international cricket, whenever he played for Mumbai, Amol Mazumdar was seen scratching Sachin's groin after when Sachin was tired.

Kumble: Kumble said he does not believe it but will have his brother develop a software to calculate how long Sachin would scratch his butt to relieve the itch. He said that the software will also calculate the angles of Sachin's hand and the wrist position while performing the scratching task.

Zaheer: Zaheer was angry at the fact that no one noticed him scratching his butt in full public view during the WC 2003. He said, the itch was the reason he was not able to bowl properly.
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fineleg

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Re: Tendulkar Scratches Butt
« Reply #3 on: May 08, 2006, 06:44:25 PM »
Itch-Guard.

(this is a joke for those who watched Eurasia cup and saw the commercials shown - there were some real stupid commercials - one of them was this).
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dhruvdeepak

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Re: Tendulkar Scratches Butt
« Reply #4 on: May 08, 2006, 06:53:36 PM »
hahaahahah thande thande dermi-cool!
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flute202020

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Re: Tendulkar Scratches Butt
« Reply #5 on: May 08, 2006, 08:23:41 PM »
CP, excellent post..appaluse for you. I liked the Ganguly 15000 runs part ..Ganguly uses 15000 runs in his media interactions as randomly as you use rasgullahs in your posts, totally without relation to the point under discussion.   ;D ;D ;D
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Cover Point

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Re: Tendulkar Scratches Butt
« Reply #6 on: May 08, 2006, 08:29:13 PM »
Wow! After languishing in the 190's for an eternity it took a Butt joke to push me past the double hundred in applause.

Now I am a proud double double centurian :)

I am sure even Dexy wont begrudge me a rasgullah for this feat :)
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prfsr

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Re: Tendulkar Scratches Butt
« Reply #7 on: May 08, 2006, 08:43:53 PM »
Completely off-topic, but anyway....

CP: Rasgullah's are also associated in Bengal with zero -- so if you got a zero in (say) math, people would say you got a rosogollah! Some people extend that to scores -- so rosogollah is a duck.

Are you sure you want it now ? :D

-P

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fineleg

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Re: Tendulkar Scratches Butt
« Reply #8 on: May 08, 2006, 08:56:49 PM »
Completely off-topic, but anyway....

CP: Rasgullah's are also associated in Bengal with zero -- so if you got a zero in (say) math, people would say you got a rosogollah! Some people extend that to scores -- so rosogollah is a duck.

Are you sure you want it now ? :D

-P



Zero or 100 - CP prob does not care - its sweet and he will want it!
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Cover Point

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Re: Tendulkar Scratches Butt
« Reply #9 on: May 08, 2006, 09:29:17 PM »
Zero or 100 - CP prob does not care - its sweet and he will want it!

Zigzactly! It tastes good. AND it has an added bonus of annoying Dex and the gang just by thought of devouring one. You cant have a better sweet.

In anycase, Zero may correctly predict my real life score from this weekends league game. Bowled by an express inswinger! Shame on me (my version is that it swung atleast 3 feet :)
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k-slice

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Re: Tendulkar Scratches Butt
« Reply #10 on: May 09, 2006, 04:48:12 AM »
cp that is funny as hell.
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