Unusual Suspects (Rhymed verse, worst)
There once was a left-handed tiger from Bengal;
‘God of the off-side’, he was feted by The Wall.
Few spinners could survive his lofted maul -
None could match the way he timed the ball..
His amazing consistency
Was rewarded with captaincy.
All hailed Sourav, His Excellency!
In the selection procedures he had lots of influency.
But alas! There appeared problems with his fluency.
On tracks bouncy,
His shots were chancy;
His footwork marked with hesitancy.
Such inconsistency,
Caused by technical discrepancy,
Along with his innate irreverency,
Did not catch Greg Chappel’s fancy.
Who said, “Cricket is important to his financy..”
Which led to Dada’s down fallacy…
From the throne of cricket’s aristocracy,
(And everyone in Bengal went crazy)
Watching from the sidelines, Master blaster Tendulkar..
His own form, a far cry from the spectacular.
The backfoot cover drive, frontfoot straight drive,
Replaced by defensive attempts to stay alive.
The furious paddle sweep,
Now stashed into his drawer deep.
The feasts of all the shots we were to behold,
Fleeting glimpses that flit by before he’s out-bowled.
Adding to Sourav’s insult, Sachin’s injury
Ranging from elbow to toe to fingery,
Sixteen years of international wear and tear,
Apparently more than his body can bear.
The little big man’s appearances are markedly rare,
His retirement date, round the corner somewhere.
How many Tests has he won!
Using his non-turning wrong ‘un!
But alas – Anil is a one day misfit –
His guile not inducing too many a mis-hit,
Under pressure, he may be pretty cool,
But his fielding makes him the butt of ridicule;
His batting style that’s based on blocking,
Not the kind that sets the run rate rocking –
So its swansong time for Kumble to sing,
Turning duties solely to Harbhajan Singh.
His trusted lieutenants, thus, all but gone –
Leaving us with just The Wall to rely upon;
‘As he sows, so shall he be reaper’
- Of runs by the hundreds, he’s the heaper;
The guy finds no target steeper -
One-day makeshift wicket-keeper,
Many a day, the Man Friday,
Many an inning, the sheet anchor,
ICC batting top ranker..
In the slips, safe as a banker..
Not one responsibility does he shirk..
All the more reason to give him more work;
And so it was that Rahul became skipper.
And aiding The Wall in his quest for glory -
A motley bunch to script the success story.
With all due respects..
Presenting the Unusual suspects!
Milkman Dhoni’s hairdo
Might make him seem a weirdo;
This dude of unmatched bravado,
Tonks the ball around without much ado.
Wielding the willow off front foot or back,
Giving the cherry an almighty THWACK…
His follow-through is one of a kind,
After impact, the bat finishes well behind!
Sure he’s not the best keeper that ever was,
Who cares! Look at what he did to Vaas!
His machismo comes across as striking,
He’s not designed to the bowler’s liking,
He’s the man when the runrate needs hiking
If 18 runs are required for victory,
Three balls later, the match will be history!
And meanwhile our man will be biking.
Hail the latest Sultan of Swing –
Irfan’s zippers tease and sting;
Conning the batter into careless drive..
Edging the cherry into first slip’s dive.
Delivering the ball at a friendly pace,
Delivering the goods with fiendish grace!
When elevated to one down,
Pathan literally goes to town,
Driving, cutting, slicing diligently..
Running the singles intelligently;
Pinch-hitting to him is the aesthetic art
Of taking the attack clinically apart.
It looks like we’ve finally found
A fellow with skills, all round!
Be it when he fields inside the ring
Or does his slow left arm spin bowling;
But mainly when he’s batting in full swing.
Yuvraj Singh…
Is simply amazing.
That delightful drive through mid off;
The fierce cut that splits the field in half;
The off-the-toes flick over mid-wicket,
That’s unparalleled in the history of cricket.
Sure, at times he makes catches look tougher,
Who cares! As long as he makes the bowlers suffer!
The out of form Kaif
Leads an uncharmed life.
The same can be said of Veeru
Who’s quickly gone from Heeru to Zeeru.
Bhajji’s Doosra turns just enough
To trick the batsmen into double bluff;
Raina’s too young to be rated…
So young, he can even be berated!
So that’s the core of the final eleven,
For the World Cup 2007!
The Great Wall and his men,
- The leader and his trusted ten;
Can they bring home the World Cup?
Sure! Lets keep the hopes up!
http://knittins.blogspot.com/2006/04/unusual-suspects-rhymed-verse-worst.html
AuthorTopic: Cricket Jokes (Read 2714 times)
May 25, 2006, 04:49:56 PM